I wasn’t really accurate when I said I hadn’t been writing. It’s not that I haven’t written at all. There’s this sheaf of letters to my father, all written in an adoring hand but no address to send it to. I actually thought I was crazy…writing letters that would never be read. Till I met this other person quite as mad as I am. He keeps writing to his dead wife and actually walks up to the post box and posts them…so here goes, this one’s for you Baba, just like most of all I’ve written the past 17 (?) years………
This Light (your light)
When darkness falls and the day is over
When unnamed sorrows assail my heart
In one corner of my mind you come along
And light your lonely lamp of love.
The lamp is small but gives me light
Turning my darkness into day
It burns with a constant flame and then
When I am comforted it goes away.
So I sit whenever I am hurt
Or sad or lonely or just afraid
Waiting for that little circle of light
To bathe all my cares away.
Even sometimes when I’m happy
From the corner of my eye I watch
For that lamp that gives me hope
And thank you for all your love.
I know that I will see the flame
And find the peace of knowing you care
For each night I feel your smile
Only each night there’s no one there.
If I could make visions out of air
I would have you standing here
Smiling face, indulging eyes,
Encouraging, utterly selfless and wise
There’s so much you have given me
But most of all I have your light
That burns in me a fierce flame
And comforts in the dead of night
Fire purifies the soul and so it is
Each time I suddenly feel you near
All my cares just vanish
All my fears disappear.
I know the day will come when I
Shall not need to see the light
That’s the day I shall see you again
That’s the day that I shall die…..